Conversational Intimacy

Intimacy is a difficult thing to define. Most people believe it includes a willingness to disclose one's true thoughts, feelings, wishes, and fears. If you know how to make conversations more intimate, you can make your emotional connection deeper and your...

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Anxious Attachment

Intimacy in a relationship can be a mixed blessing. When things are going well, we are happy to be close. We feel safe and secure in each other’s arms. But into every life some rain must fall. Eventually, we face some problems that seem unsolvable and the...

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Secure Attachment

There are several different types of "attachment styles" in a relationship.  One type is called Secure Attachment, but before we delve into that, first lets review the definition for intimacy. While there are many definitions for intimacy, many marriage...

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Stress Good for Marriage?

Stressed out people are usually tired, cranky, and busy. Stressful situations take precious time away from building our relationship and handling issues as they arise. Stress also reduces our sex drive. How can that be good for a marriage? As with many...

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Art of Apology

A heartfelt apology is the most powerful way to restore a relationship when there has been an injury or breach. If handled badly or offered in the wrong spirit, however, an apology is sure to cause more harm than good. Sadly, even well-intended apologies...

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Tools for a Great Relationship

Do you ever wonder how your relationship is doing? Is so, you’re like many couples who want to make sure they are on the right track and free from problems that could turn into fatal flaws down the road.  It’s actually pretty easy to get valid, detailed...

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10 Years and 10 Million

"Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake." Imagine you are given 10 Million dollars, but you have only 10 years to live. List what you would want to do, be, or have. Then, circle the 10 items you would miss most if they never happened. It's always...

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Improve your Relationship

In the strongest relationships, love and support is given frequently without being asked. The happiest couples actively seek to find out how their partner feels the most supported and loved (through their individual Love Language) and strives to give them...

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Gratefulness Game

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn, or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude." Sometimes in our day to day stressful lives, we easily forget the little things for which we...

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Becoming a Stepparent

While parenting is one of life’s great joys, even under the best of circumstances, it is hard to do well. With many demands on your time, energy, and attention, you may feel as though you can never get everything done. It can feel as though there isn’t...

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Savoring the Past

"We are so often caught up in our destination that we forget to appreciate the journey, especially the goodness of the people we meet along the way." Do this exercise with your partner. For each item below, describe out loud as many incidents as you can...

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One Door Opens

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” Think of times in your life when you did not get an opportunity that you wanted, an important goal or plan did not come through, or you were hurt...

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Bring Back the Joy

I remember hearing a wonderful quote long ago: "Sometimes the joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile is the source of the joy."  It really emphasizes the interplay between the energy you put out versus the energy you take in. In my...

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Time for Love

Most people agree that spending more time with their partner would enrich their relationship. In fact, research has consistently found that it's the quality of our relationships - not our jobs, possessions, or accomplishments – that determine how happy we...

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Gratitude

Amid the rush and excitement of our lives, it's easy to forget to take a moment and notice the many blessings we enjoy every day. Even during difficult times, cultivating gratitude can be one of the best things we do for ourselves and those we love. Being...

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Falling into the Pit

Even the happiest couples face difficult problems from time to time that stem from the way their lives, their dreams, their needs, and their personalities, intersect and interact. Some of these conflicts may even seem unsolvable at times. One partner might want to...

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Emotional Bank Accounts

Just as making deposits to your savings account can build up cash reserves, give you a feeling of security, and help protect you from a financial crisis if you fall on hard times, building up your relationship's "emotional bank account" can help you enjoy...

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Strengths Dates

Do you find life exhausting and frustrating? Or is it easy and exhilarating? The difference between the two experiences may hinge on something simple: whether or not your life is aligned to your signature strengths. Signature strengths are the things we...

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Happy Housework

Who's doing what and how much are you arguing about it? When you first thought about living together, did you think arguments over housework would be part of the picture? I bet not. It turns out that housework is one of couples' top three arguments and a...

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Love Languages

 I was in a greeting card store on Valentine's Day last year and it was quite an experience. I was the only woman among a swarm of men sifting through rows of Valentine's Day cards, picking one up in hopes it would be just right, and putting it back with...

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